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How does one navigate this “glass ceiling” of aging?

I want to be in a relationship, and I’m worried it’s not going to happen. Here’s what I think about middle-aged men who say that they’re looking for much younger women: it’s often a dream, driven by a midlife crisis or a bruised ego.

But I do know women, and lots of women in their 20’s. A few women may bridge this gap for lust or money or dimestore psychological reasons, but most of the 28-year-old women I know would prefer to date a great, stable 30-40 year-old – who also knows what Snapchat is. But don’t forget, you and your younger girlfriends are the EXCEPTION. When I was in my late 30’s I became involved with someone 15 yrs. The age difference did not seem especially significant during the 5 yrs we were together.

And the truth is that most of them are completely creeped out at the prospect of dating a guy who was alive when JFK was alive. Now in my mid 40’s though, the idea of dating someone in their 60’s does seem like a big difference in terms of where we each are in life.

I also look about 10 years younger than my age (54).

I am really energetic and still enjoy many of the things I enjoyed in my 20s and 30s.

Harrison Ford being an exception for me as well though, I have to say.

I am not terribly conventional, I have a doctorate, and I’m fairly independent.

On the flip side, when I meet men in real life, I do attract more of the type I like—my age or younger and energetic.

An older man’s going to be the strong, nurturing guy who takes care of her, teaches her, and treats her like a princess – the kind of relationship that she probably lacked growing up.

Hey, I’m no psychologist – just your friendly, neighborhood dating coach. Whether we like it or not, there is nearly a full generation gap between 28 and 45.

Time creates wisdom – but it also creates responsibilities and complications – mortgage, kids, career, etc.

All of this makes dating more and more complex as we get older. Still, most of them fail miserably, for the exact same reasons that I think Penelope is suggesting.

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